Translated from Greek, the word character means chasing, imprint. Already from the name itself it follows that character is a stable system of personality traits of a person. Regardless of your age or experience, character building is a lifelong learning process that includes experience, leadership, and a constant pursuit of self-improvement and maturity. Start building your character now.
Method 1 of 3: Gaining Experience
Step 1. Be prepared to take risks
Like an athlete who must learn to lose in order to appreciate victory, a person must learn to take risks in order to form character. The character is tempered in trials. Strive for success, no matter what the result will be. Take on work that you think is too difficult for you.
- Don't be afraid to take risks. Ask a girl out on a date, even if you think she won't agree. Take on additional responsibilities at work, even if you're not sure you can't handle them. Think about what you want to achieve in this life and do your best to achieve your goal.
- Don't look for excuses for your inaction. Find the reasons why you should do it. Climb the mountains with friends, even if you don't feel confident enough. Don't make excuses, find reasons.
- Of course, character building doesn't mean being reckless when it comes to your safety. Dangerous driving, or alcohol and drug abuse, has nothing to do with character building. Take only justified risks.
Step 2. Surround yourself with people with strong character
Connect with people you respect for their strength of character. For different people, these will be different traits. Decide for yourself what you want to become and find role models.
- Chat with people who are older than you. Unfortunately, we spend very little time with older people. Make friends with someone older than you and listen to their opinion on a particular issue. Spend time with older relatives, learn from them.
- Connect with people who are different from you. If you are naturally shy, hang out with outgoing people. Thanks to this, you will be able to adopt the qualities that you lack.
- Connect with people you admire. If you want to have a strong character, hang out with people you admire, whom you want to be like, and from whom you can learn a lot. Don't surround yourself with people who will flatter your ears. Make friends with people who will help you shape your character.
Step 3. Get out of your comfort zone
The character is formed in difficult life situations. Try volunteering to help sick children, or take the time to fulfill your responsibilities in the church. Take time to help others.
Travel and stay in places that are not particularly comfortable, try to feel at home. Visit a city you've never been to, ask for directions from passers-by
Step 4. Do unpleasant work from time to time
Clean your meat grinder at a fast food restaurant. Stir in the hot summer sun. Serve an annoyed customer at a shoe store. Of course, few people want to go through such tests, but if you want to have a strong character, learn how to complete difficult tasks. You will learn to value money more when you see how difficult it is to make it.
By doing unpleasant work, you can better understand the people who have to do it day in and day out. For example, work at McDonald's is quite difficult and a person working here needs a strong character
Step 5. Strive for self-improvement
Character building is an ongoing process. If you want to be a person who is admired and respected, make an effort to become better.
- Set goals for yourself. Select the goal that you want to achieve at the moment. Maybe you want to be a good listener, or be responsible for your work. Gradually strive to achieve your goal.
- Remembering ourselves in childhood, we sometimes experience shame and embarrassment. An ugly haircut, irritability and immaturity - you shouldn't blush for all this. It is an integral part of character building.
Method 2 of 3: Be a Leader
Step 1. Learn to empathize
Among Lincoln's papers after his death, they found a note to the general who did not follow the order. In it, Lincoln wrote that he was upset over the general's behavior. This note was written in a harsh and rude tone. Interestingly, the note was not sent, probably because Lincoln empathized with this general who saw a lot of blood in Gettysburg. Lincoln gave the general the benefit of the doubt.
- If your friend disrupts your plans, or if your boss forgot to praise you for your work, try ignoring it. Learn from the past and be more careful about your expectations next time.
- A person with a strong character sees more than the big picture. In Lincoln's case, expressing discontent could only make matters worse. What's done is done, and what's past is past. Leave the past and focus on the future.
Step 2. When you yourself can let off steam
The fact that Lincoln did not send the letter does not mean that it was not important to him. While you may have a strong character, you are not made of ice. You may experience anger, frustration, and depression. This is part of our life. Do not hide these emotions within yourself, it will not contribute to the formation of character, it will only harm you. Do something that will help you release your frustration and anger, letting go of negative emotions.
- Pour all your rage on paper, then burn this sheet. Listen to Slayer when you lift the bar in the gym. Run. Use exercise as an opportunity to release negative emotions.
- For example, Frank Underwood, politician and protagonist of House of Cards, lets off steam by playing violent video games. Find a way to help you relax.
Step 3. Communicate with different people
A person with a strong character can openly communicate with different people. Don't limit your social circle. You can learn a lot by interacting with different people. Chat with the bartender in the cafe, work colleagues, friends and family members. Listen. Be honest with yourself. This will help you build a strong character.
If you want to find an outlet and vent your feelings, find someone to whom you can open your heart. However, let your conversations not only revolve around problems, talk about something pleasant too
Step 4. Get ready to fail
As James Michener said, "Not everything works out the first time." Sometimes, in order to achieve something, you need to make 3-4 attempts. How do you feel about challenging tasks? Learn, faced with defeat, not to give up, but to move on. This will speak of strength of character.
- Learn this by completing small tasks. It is difficult to learn how to adequately respond to failure when it comes to serious issues such as going to college or work and other serious situations. Learn healthy competition by playing board games, participating in competitive sports, so you can compete when it comes to more serious situations.
- Be correct about your victory. Think about the feelings of the loser. Celebrate your victory, however, without hurting the feelings of others.
Step 5. Tackle difficult tasks
A person with a strong character is ready to take on difficult tasks. At school, work, or elsewhere, strive to do quality work.
- In school, set a goal of not just getting “good grades,” set a goal of doing your best. You may not even know what you are capable of.
- At work, take on new responsibilities, be prepared to spend extra hours at the office, and each time, do your best as you get the job done. Whatever you do, do it well.
- At home, too, strive for self-improvement. For example, instead of spending time aimlessly in front of the TV, devote it to learning to play the guitar, try yourself as a writer, or repair a roadster. Take your hobbies seriously.
Method 3 of 3: Growth and Development
Step 1. Think of failure as an opportunity for further growth
Failure is considered by some successful businessmen to be an integral part of success. Failure is simply a speed bump on the way to a goal. Do not give up when faced with failure, try to analyze the situation, learn valuable lessons and next time you will be successful.
Consider your failure scientifically. If you started working for a company that went bankrupt, or if you lost your job, say to failure, "Welcome!" Perhaps it was just one wrong answer in the list of correct answers. And now it will be easier for you to get the job done
Step 2. Stop looking for people's approval
Locus of control is a concept in psychology that characterizes the personality's property to attribute its successes or failures to internal or external factors. People with an "inner locus" think about satisfying their desires and do not pay attention to the opinions of others. People with an external locus think about how to please people. While self-sacrifice is definitely a positive character trait, be mindful of your feelings. If you want to learn to control your life and character, do what you think is right, and not what is right in the eyes of others.
Step 3. Think Big
Strive for your goals. What do you want to achieve in your life? Dedicate your life entirely to this. If you want to be a professional musician, go to a big city, start a band, and start giving concerts. If you want to be a writer, find a job that gives you enough time to do it. Be absorbed in your passion. Strive to reach the pinnacle of success.
A person of strong character is content with what he has. You may find it rewarding to stay in your hometown. For some, family is what they want to achieve in this life. Learn to be happy with what you have
Step 4. Find the ladder and start climbing
Decide where you want to go and choose the most convenient route for yourself. If you want to become a doctor, find out what education you need to get in order to then have a job. In addition, determine in which educational institution it is better to study. Believe me, great success awaits you.
Step 5. Try to notice and accept certain points in your life
Try to see them in retrospect. These are the moments when you have been challenged. Try to learn valuable lessons from such situations so that you do not repeat mistakes in the future. Take a look at the situation honestly and without bias.
- Think over all possible scenarios. If you move to another part of the country to pursue a career, what might happen? What happens if you stay in your hometown? Will you be able to come to terms with any outcome of the case? What will you need to do?
- A person with a strong character will make the right choice. Are you ready to go for meanness just to take the place of your colleague with a higher salary? Can you live with it? The choice is yours.
Step 6. Be constantly busy and avoid idleness
People with strong character are performers, not talkers. If you decide to act, do not put it off in a distant box, but start doing it right now. Take action today.
- People with strong character avoid idle behavior. Such people will not spend nights flying in clubs, and then sleep off during the day. Strive to lead a moral life, avoid laziness.
- Try to balance your work and play as much as possible. If you love reading books and studying, choose work and play related to acquiring knowledge. If you enjoy being constantly on the move, head to the gym. If you do what you enjoy, you will have a strong character.