If you're struggling to grow up, start by redefining your daily life. Growing up is not related to age or relationships. The more you learn about yourself and learn to set goals, the faster you will mature. Prepare for the future, learn to overcome life's difficulties, and you will enter adulthood with dignity.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Study Yourself
Step 1. Unleash your talents
What makes you unique? Start growing up as a young adult. Your interests, talents and skills will give you some idea of who you can become, so uncover your talents and define your life goals. What do you want to become? What do you want to do? Study yourself.
As a young person, do music and sports, paint, take part in theatrical performances, and read a lot. Do what you like and what you have no idea about. Try something new like dancing or photography. Perhaps your talents lie in an area that you haven’t done yet
Step 2. Think about who you will be in 10 years
You don't have to plan out the rest of your life, but it's important to think about who you want to become. Do you want to go to university? Are you studying what you want to study and do you have plans for the future? Do you want to start making money as early as possible? Are you going to travel? Make a list of your priorities and the goals you want to achieve.
- If you want to go to university, think about what subject you want to study. Consider going to one of the local universities or one of the most famous universities. Find out how much it will cost to study at different universities and consider if you can afford it.
- If you want to start working, think about the amount you want to earn (per day, month, year) and explore job options that will allow you to receive the required amount. Then find out what knowledge and skills are needed to do this job and move on to learning and gaining them.
Step 3. Visit new places and gain new experiences to broaden your horizons and gain knowledge about life in other parts of the world
Traveling and connecting with people from other cultures will help you grow up faster.
- Travel is not a prerogative of the elite. If you cannot afford to travel abroad, travel your country - visit where you have never been. Moreover, you can become a tourist in your hometown! Visit unknown areas of your city.
- WWOOF (Volunteer Workers on Organic Farms) provides an opportunity to work in different countries. In addition, there are many humanitarian organizations where you can see the world.
Step 4. Communicate with people
Communicate with as many different people as possible. Imitate the actions of the people you respect.
- Find a role model (at work). Find people whose work style you admire. Take an example from such people. For example, if your colleague is performing well despite obstacles created by department (or company-wide) policy, do as he / she does.
- Find an example to follow (in life). As you grow up, you may lose old friends and not make new ones. One day you will realize that the people around you are your work colleagues. Therefore, make friends who are involved in completely different things (that is, work in other areas), but who have common interests or hobbies with you. If your friend is engaged in heating and ventilation, this does not mean that you cannot go fishing with him.
Step 5. Be honest with yourself
As you grow up, you will understand yourself better. If you are prone to laziness or like to procrastinate, then these qualities should not come as a surprise to you when you reach, for example, twenty years of age. A teenager may ignore his weaknesses, but an adult needs to know and fight his weaknesses.
- Identify your strengths. What are you doing especially well? What area do you specialize in? Take time to identify your strengths and personality traits that you are proud of.
- Identify your weaknesses. What needs to be worked on? What is holding you back from getting what you want? It is important to identify your weaknesses that need improvement and work on them.
Part 2 of 3: Act Like an Adult
Step 1. Control your childishness
There is no clear distinction between childhood and adulthood. But growing up doesn't mean you have to give up your youth; it means that you must control ill-conceived (childhood) desires and channel the energy of youth towards more mature goals.
- Childishness is associated with chaos. The child is disorganized and unprepared, and his life is very chaotic, while the life of most adults is measured and ordered. Chaos is a lack of control or structure. Identify the elements of your life that are chaotic and channel your energies into organizing them.
- Childhood is associated with helplessness. Someone has to tie the child's shoes, feed him, and support him emotionally. An adult is more independent. As you grow up, rely on yourself most of the time and not on other people.
- Childishness is associated with resentment. Don't be offended if your coworker gets rewarded and you don't. Sensitivity is similar to a child's hysterics. If you don't learn how to manage frustration (by looking at the situation from different angles) and move on, then it can develop into resentment and anger (like a child).
Step 2. Learn to say no
Teenagers are impulsive. Teens say yes to another drink at a party or are willing to skip work for a trip out of town. An adult knows his boundaries and knows how to stand up for himself. If your friends are going to a music festival, but you are working that day, tell them no.
Make tactical decisions that guide you towards strategic goals. If on a day off you have the opportunity to play computer games or do something that will lead to your promotion and achievement of your goals, then choosing the second option is a mature decision
Step 3. Dress appropriately for your age
When going to work, leave your shorts and a T-shirt in a drawer. Men and women should wear clean clothing suitable for the particular occasion. Dress the way you like it on weekends or while on vacation.
Step 4. Take care of your body
Don't overuse pasta and fast food. After graduating from university, forget about your culinary and dress preferences.
Exercise and watch your diet. Many freshmen think that once they go to university, they can quit playing sports and start eating whatever they want. Doing so will put you on weight (which is difficult to lose without exercise) and get used to eating poorly
Step 5. In cases of failure, act like an adult
If children do not succeed, they start to fuss. Teenagers are offended. Adults take responsibility for their actions, analyze failures, and move on. As you grow up, you must learn to overcome setbacks and, no matter what, move forward. Don't give up if things don't go as planned.
The harsh truth of life is that just because you deserve something doesn't mean you get it. Follow your goals and don't let injustice demoralize you. Life is difficult and you will have to overcome obstacles on your own
Step 6. Maintain a long-term relationship
As a young person, you build relationships based on the circumstances: you are friends with the people you study with, with whom you work, whom you know. As you grow up, you will make new friends (and most likely forget old ones). Adults build relationships on a long-term basis. Learn to distinguish between fleeting and long-term relationships, and take proactive steps to maintain the relationship you want to keep. Chat with friends, visit each other and take part in the lives of your good friends.
Also, adults tend to maintain long-term romantic relationships. If you enjoy a fleeting relationship, try not to have one for two months and consider if you feel better without it. If you're prone to a long-term relationship, stop the one that isn't developing (don't be romantically involved with someone simply because you enjoy stability)
Step 7. Develop empathy skills
Meet new people, learn about their lives and try to understand the worldview of other people. Teenagers often think of themselves as more advanced people than their parents, and only as they grow up, they realize that their parents grew up in a completely different world. Being an adult is being able to understand and empathize with other people.
- Connect with people who are much older than you and learn from them. At work and in the community, seek and connect with older people and learn from their experience, knowledge and wisdom.
- Read a variety of literature to learn about the worldview of others. Read about various political ideologies and identify which one you agree with.
Step 8. Be reliable
An adult's words must be backed up by action. If you say you will do something, do it. You will find it difficult to maintain relationships at work and in your daily life if you are not perceived as a reliable person. This is forgivable for adolescents and children, but adults should be held accountable for their words. The people around you should know that they can rely on you.
Always treat friends, family, and colleagues with respect. Treat people the way you want them to treat you. If you don't respect other people, then no one will respect you either. It won't always do you good, but you will be much happier
Step 9. Rest responsibly
Don't have fun or drink the way you did during your student days. With age, the body wears out. In addition, cheeky behavior, considered normal in youth, after thirty is considered indecent. If you only think about partying and don't go to work because you got drunk in a nightclub, then it's time to grow up.
Be moderate. Growing up doesn't mean you can't have fun, but you should know when to stop. Hire a caregiver, check your schedule for the next day, and show young children how to do it
Step 10. Be open
The adult is confident and emotionally mature. Don't make excuses if your boss scolds you for your work. Be skeptical about this.
Being open doesn't mean that you shouldn't defend yourself, or that you should become a rag. Most likely, an emotionally mature person will accept objective criticism without resentment or resentment, but be prepared to respond to non-constructive criticism. Learn to distinguish between objective (constructive) and biased (non-constructive) criticism
Part 3 of 3: Take responsibility
Step 1. Find a job
Your first job is an important step into adulthood. Unless you are a child of wealthy parents, you need to work. Some start working at school, and some at university or even after university. There is no universal moment to start working, but work is an important step into adulthood.
Part-time work is a great way to get the skills you need and extra income (even if your parents are still supporting you). However, gradually get used to more independence in making money
Step 2. Plan your budget
You might want to spend your entire first salary on a new electric guitar and two concert tickets, but that's teenage behavior. Start saving by putting some of your salary in a bank account. Plan a budget that will allow you to live comfortably, taking into account the necessary expenses, and also make savings. Try to balance your income with recurring expenses and the measures needed to achieve your long-term goals.
- Monthly expenses include rent, utilities and food costs. Most expenses can be accurately predicted, and spend a little more on food than you actually need (if you're not sure, calculate how much you spend on food in a week, and then multiply the result by four).
- Try saving money. Add a certain percentage of your salary to your account and in a few months (or years) you will accumulate a certain amount. Even if you save a very small amount every month, this is a step into adulthood.
Step 3. Pay your bills on time
It is not easy to start living on your own, especially if you are still studying. However, it is important to move towards financial independence and take responsibility. Your goal is to stay on budget and not rely on financial help (from parents or friends).
Pay for your utilities and rent yourself first, then pay for your phone and car bills. Gradually move towards financial self-sufficiency
Step 4. Create a good credit history
Pay your bills on time and take advantage of every opportunity to build a good credit history. When signing a lease, put your name on utility bills or make a timely payment by credit card to create a credit history that will help you in the future (in obtaining a loan to buy a house or for other large purchases and investments).
- Young people often use credit cards unwisely. A credit card is not a bottomless barrel. Don't pay for large purchases with a credit card without thinking about the consequences. Use your credit card to make regular purchases (for example, at the grocery store) and immediately cover overspending on your credit card. Use a debit (not credit) card to avoid problems.
- Make loan payments, bill payments and other payments on time. Don't waste your money and stick to your budget.
Step 5. Save money
Put the extra income in a savings account and don't touch that money (even if you really want to). This is an easy way to accumulate a certain amount towards your long-term goals.
Start saving money for your retirement fund. Some companies help their employees save money for retirement, for example, choosing a reliable retirement fund
Step 6. Live within your means
Simply put, buy what you can afford and plan ahead of time how you will pay for your purchase. Do not buy goods on credit if you do not know how you will repay it, and do not take out a lot of loans if your salary does not allow you to repay them on time.
- It is very difficult to buy a house or pay tuition fees without taking out a loan. Therefore, most likely, at some point in your life, you will be faced with the need to take out a large loan. Talk to a financial advisor to find out which lending method is best for you.
- Consolidate debt if you can. Monthly payments on multiple loans can get confusing and confusing, especially if you don't pay enough attention to it.
Step 7. Be ambitious at work and take on new responsibilities
This characterizes your maturity.
- Take a leadership role if given the opportunity. Don't worry about whether you are suitable for the position or not.
- While you need to be ambitious and take on new responsibilities, feel free to turn down offers that don't align with your life goals.
Advice
- Maturity is not age. Everyone gets old, but not everyone matures.
- Don't rely on others for your goals in life. You create your own life. Stop complaining and understand that your life is really the result of your actions (and inaction). You came into this world with nothing and you will leave with nothing. Everything in between these events depends only on you.
- Growing up is not about rebelling against your parents. On the contrary, your parents can help you become independent.
- You yourself determine what you are worth. If you believe that you are worthy of much, people will feel it in their interactions with you. If you don't love yourself, people will feel it too. And if you really do not love yourself, you need to work on yourself and fix what needs to be corrected.