Knowing yourself is an important step in achieving happiness and peace. To know your true self, identify the qualities that make you unique. Reflecting and meditating daily will help you develop a deeper understanding of your personality. Over time, you will be able to build on these discoveries to create a strong and fulfilling relationship with yourself.
Method 1 of 3: Practice Introspection
Step 1. Learn to be honest with yourself
Knowing yourself means taking into account different aspects of your personality, individuality and essence. And the goal here is not to criticize yourself, but to recognize all aspects of your personality. Open up opportunities to learn something new about yourself.
- As you evaluate yourself, pay attention to things that make you feel uncomfortable. These emotional cues will tell you which aspects of your personality you are trying to avoid. Is there a particular feature that makes you feel insecure? If so, what can you do to deal with this?
- For example, if you don't like looking in the mirror, ask yourself why? Do you have complexes about your appearance? Or are you worried about age? Think about whether you can overcome this fear.
Step 2. Ask yourself thoughtful questions
This knowledge will help you understand what makes you happy or makes you tense. Use this information to spend more time on productive activities and goals. Here are some questions to ask yourself:
- What do you like to do?
- What do you dream about in life?
- How do you see your legacy?
- What do you criticize yourself most for?
- What mistakes did you make?
- How do others perceive you? How would you like to be perceived?
- Who is your role model?
Step 3. Listen to your inner voice
Your inner voice expresses what you feel and what you believe. When something makes you upset or happy, he reacts to it. Try to tune in to this inner voice. What he says? How does he perceive the world around you?
- Go to the mirror. Either out loud or mentally start describing yourself. Is this a positive or negative description? Is it focused on your appearance or behavior? Are you talking about your successes or failures?
- If you start thinking negatively, stop and ask yourself why you are reacting this way. Shame or criticism can be a sign that you are defending yourself against unwanted thoughts.
- These positive and negative thoughts determine how you see yourself. If your personality doesn't match who you want to be, take steps to become a better person or develop new personality traits.
Step 4. Keep a journal every day
Journaling will help you recognize your motives, emotions, and beliefs and give you the opportunity to make thoughtful adjustments in your life. For a few minutes each day, write down what you did, felt, and thought throughout the day. If you had a negative experience, write down why it affected you. If you make a mistake, figure out how you could have avoided it.
- Look for patterns in your letter. Over time, you may find that you have recurring needs and desires.
- You can write whatever is on your mind. Free-form writing will help release subconscious thoughts so that you can understand what is bothering you.
- Alternatively, you can use detailing questions to guide your letter. Choose questions that ask you to describe specific aspects of your personality or habit.
Step 5. Introduce self-awareness into your daily life
Self-awareness is the act of experiencing the present moment, which helps to know one's own thoughts and actions. Self-awareness often includes daily meditation, but other practices also apply. The most important thing is the state of attention to yourself and to the world with which you interact.
- Take a moment and listen to your five senses. What do you sense, hear, see, as well as what smells and what taste do you feel?
- Do not eat in front of a computer or TV. Take breaks specifically for meals. Enjoy the taste, texture, temperature and feel of every bite of your food.
- Take a few minutes each day to just pause and observe the world around you. Try to note as many sensations as possible around you. What do you hear, feel, taste and what smells do you pick up?
- If you have an emotional reaction, ask yourself questions. Why are you experiencing these feelings? What caused them?
Step 6. Determine your body image
Try to write down a list of adjectives that describe your appearance. When finished, review this list. Are these positive or negative qualities? If you find yourself feeling negative about your body, try to think of ways to love it. Confidence in your body can translate into confidence in other aspects of your life.
- Try to replace negative perceptions with positive ones. For example, if you have a mole that you are embarrassed about, try calling it a fly. Do not forget that many famous actresses have flies.
- Think about the things you can reasonably change if they make you truly unhappy. If you have complexes due to acne, you can go to a dermatologist or learn how to mask them with cosmetics.
Method 2 of 3: Explore Your Personality
Step 1. Determine the roles you are playing
Each person plays several roles in their life based on personal relationships, work responsibilities, and social interactions. List your roles and write down what each means to you. Here are some examples of roles:
- a person providing emotional support;
- mentor / ward;
- problem solver.
Step 2. Write down your main indicators in life
These include values, interests, temperament, activities, life goals and strengths. Try to describe for yourself each of these categories in a notebook or in a text editor.
- Values: What is important to you? What qualities do you value in yourself and others? What motivates you to complete the task?
- Interests: What are the things that make you curious? What do you like to do in your free time? What fascinates you?
- Temperament: Come up with ten words that describe your personality.
- Activity: How do you spend your day? What are the most and least enjoyable moments in your daily routine? Do you have any daily rituals?
- Life goals: What were the most important events in your life? Why? Where do you see yourself in five years? And in ten years?
- Strengths: What abilities, skills and talents do you have? What do you do best?
Step 3. Take an online personality assessment test
Although personality tests are not scientifically supported, they ask questions that force you to consider different aspects of your character. There are many reputable tests that can be taken online. Here is some of them:
- test for personality type according to the Myers-Briggs system;
- Minnesota Multidimensional Personality Inventory (MMPI);
- testing according to The Predictive Index method;
- psychological test "Big Five".
Step 4. Seek comments from other people
Of course, you shouldn't characterize yourself based on what others have to say, but their opinion will help you learn things about yourself that you may not have realized.
- Start by asking loved ones how they would describe your personality and your personality traits.
- If you're not shy, ask your boss, mentor, or acquaintances what they think of you as a person.
- If you disagree with someone else's observation, that's okay! These comments do not define who you are, and you may find more acceptance from other people.
Step 5. Rate your satisfaction with the results
After you have received your personality and character assessment, analyze what you have learned to see if you are happy with yourself. Are these values and traits consistent with who you want to be? If the answer is yes, look for ways to develop or improve these character traits. If the answer is no, try coming up with a set of personal self-improvement goals.
- Use your strengths to find happiness. For example, if you realize that you are a creative person who loves to work with your hands, sign up for drawing lessons or start learning a new craft.
- If you want to get better at something, use what you know about yourself to come up with a personalized plan. For example, if you find that you are an introvert but want to become more outgoing, learn to communicate in small groups. Find a balance between time for yourself and time for others, and you can lead an exciting social life that suits you.
Method 3 of 3: Satisfy Your Needs
Step 1. Take care of yourself
If you are overwhelmed by stress and work, it will be difficult for you to find time to introspect. It's important to take care of yourself both emotionally and physically. Thanks to this, you will find greater harmony with yourself.
- Get into the habit of exercising daily. You can do cardio workouts for 20 minutes or just take a short walk.
- Sleep at least 7-9 hours a day.
- Eat healthy foods, mostly fresh fruits, vegetables, and whole grains.
- Take time to relax every day. You can meditate or do something that helps you relax, such as knitting, puzzles, or reading books.
Step 2. Create a good work-life balance
Don't define yourself solely by your career or promotion. Yes, being proud of your work is good, but still try to find space for yourself outside the office. Don't take work home. Set aside some time each day for other goals, hobbies, and interests.
- Of course, work is important, but your own well-being should be your priority.
- Establish work boundaries so that the service doesn't interfere with your other relationships. For example, don't reply to non-urgent emails outside of business hours.
Step 3. Set boundaries in the relationship
Knowing your boundaries will make you happier in your relationship. Try to identify which types of interactions are causing you discomfort, stress, or frustration. Use them to set personal boundaries.
- Ask yourself what situations make you uncomfortable. For example, do you dislike crowds of people? Or are certain jokes unacceptable to you?
- Consider if there is someone in your life who demands too much of you or forces you to do something you don't want. Determine what requests or requirements you do not want to fulfill.
Step 4. Set goals that will make you happy
Setting goals will help you achieve what you want in life. Try to come up with a few goals to help you achieve your dream. Strive for goals that bring you happiness, not goals driven by superficial desires such as money or prestige.
- For example, you might start with a goal of writing 500 words a day. Do this because you love to write, not because you want to be a famous writer.
- Small and personal goals can be set if desired. For example, you can teach how to decorate cookies better before the holidays.
- If you have a big goal for yourself, add some smaller goals to help you get to the finish line. For example, if your dream is to travel around Europe with a backpack on your back, a small goal might be to save money, buy tickets, and plan your trip.
Step 5. Periodically rethink your desires and needs
Analyze your life from time to time. Have some of your desires changed? Is there something new in your life that changed your priorities? Knowing yourself is an ongoing process. As an old friend, keep connecting with yourself.
- Reread your diary from time to time. This will help you see how your habits and priorities have changed.
- After major life changes, such as a new job or a move, you can reassess how your daily concerns, skills, and desires have changed.
- If you have certain habits or addictions that no longer meet your needs or goals, you may want to get rid of them. Replace them with more productive activities that help you achieve your goals.